Okay, so I left the Cinque Terre today and now I'm in Rome and I'm at a really sketchy hostel, the circumstances of which have almost induced two panic attacks. I mean, this place is beyond. It's dirty. The bathrooms smell like pee. The kitchen is a Dickensian hovel. Worst of all, the older gentlemen who works at the front desk lives in the hostel and sleeps in the room that I'm in. Ahhhhhhh...They didn't put that on hostelworld.com. I can't handle this. I can't handle this at all. The place is called Rome Student House, not Rome Hostel for the Displaced and Quasi-Homeless. Oh my god. And you all know how much I like cleanliness and dislike urine smells and hovels in general.

I woke up today in paradise and am going to bed in hell. Where in the name of goodness is Dante when you need him? Or better yet, can someone please send me Virgil to lead my ass out of here? I'm sorry you are all witnessing this melt-down. This too shall pass. Breath, Marianne, breath.

Okay, tomorrow there will be pictures of the Cinque Terre and hopefully a much better report of a sunnier side of Rome. I promise to use the words happy, kitten, and beautiful for every time that I used the word urine, bad, or hell. Deal?

Okay, I'm going to go to sleep now and look forward to a better day tomorrow. Good night.